And even though a lot of our lunchtime conversation wasn’t necessarily deep stuff about her current situation, we talked, laughed and enjoyed one another’s company. My friend was reminded that I was there for her and that it was going to be okay.

When I got home, I did a little googling to see what kind of research exists about food as an equalizer, particularly in a social setting where maybe one person feels like conversing and the other one doesn’t. Here are a few things I found:

• Communal eating increases social bonding and feelings of wellbeing, and enhances one’s sense of contentedness and embedding within the community. The more often people eat with others, the more likely they are to feel happy and satisfied with their lives. -University of Oxford
• Eating food can help create an informal environment. This can help relax people and help them interact. Having a meal together gives people something to talk about. Sharing a meal together helps to create a sense of shared activity and stimulates feelings of friendship and togetherness. -National Lottery Community Fund
• Scientifically, food’s ability to bring people together can be attributed to the release of oxytocin, often referred to as the “bonding hormone.” Sharing a meal triggers the release of oxytocin in our brains, promoting feelings of trust, empathy and social connection. Additionally, the sensory experience of eating, including the aromas, flavors and textures, can evoke powerful memories and emotions, further enhancing the social bonding that occurs during shared meals. -Medium
• When it comes to socializing and uniting people, many scholars have claimed that food plays an important role; while it can bring people together physically, it can also foster a feeling of togetherness and shared collective identity. -Psychology Today

I could go on, but I’m sure you get the idea. Of course, then I started thinking about all of the food references in the Bible. Some of Jesus’ most well known miracles involved food! He miraculously fed two different huge crowds of people who were gathered to hear him preach (Mark 6:30-44; Mark 8:1-13), and He miraculously provided wine to go along with the meal at a wedding celebration (John 2:1-11). As far as sitting down for meals Himself, Jesus made a statement with his dinner parties. 

While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciples. When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” -Matthew 9:10-13

Perhaps the most memorable meal in all of Scripture, though, was the meal Jesus ate with His disciples just before His arrest and crucifixion. We often call it the Last Supper. John’s gospel has a pretty extensive account of this meal in John 13-17. An incredible amount of things happened at this evening meal shared among friends. Jesus set an example of humble service when He washed His disciples’ feet, and He predicted that Judas would soon betray Him. He also told Peter that he would deny Jesus. Then, still over the same meal, Jesus told His disciples about the soon-to-come Holy Spirit and the importance of abiding in Him so they could bear eternal fruit. He was honest with His disciples about the trials they would face once He left earth and returned to His Father, but He assured them that the Holy Spirit would come to guide, help and teach them. Jesus said their grief would turn to joy. Finally, Jesus prayed for Himself, for His disciples and for all believers, which includes me and you if you’ve placed your trust in Him. These are some incredibly moving chapters. If you haven’t read through them recently, set aside some time to take a slow, careful look at them. 

And then, hop over to any of the other gospels, Matthew, Mark or Luke, to see the other monumental thing Jesus did at the Last Supper. He instituted the Lord’s Supper, or communion as we typically call it today! Jesus instructed His disciples to eat bread and wine, symbolic of his body and blood, as a way of remembering Him until He returns. 

What a meal! Am I saying that none of these precious words and actions from Jesus would have happened if it hadn’t been for the food being served? Nope. But am I suggesting that there’s power in sitting down to share a meal with somebody? Yes. Even if it’s not an entire meal… Maybe it’s a coffee date, an ice cream meet-up, or s’mores around a fire pit. The next time you’re seeking meaningful Christian fellowship and conversation, add some food into the mix! Maybe, just maybe, it will make everybody feel at ease. Maybe it will loosen up any nerves and awkwardness in the room and be the perfect key to an atmosphere of comfort, community and togetherness. Maybe it will take the conversation deeper and extend it longer. Maybe a little food is just what you need.