“Research has uncovered evidence that if people don’t speak in the first few minutes of a meeting, they are less likely to speak at all. This is where ice breaker questions for work meetings play a crucial role. … By simply partaking in an ice breaker activity within the first five minutes, the likelihood of sustained engagement by participants is exponentially increased across various factors.” -BREAKNICE

When searching for patterns here, the main thing I notice is that icebreakers help create a safe space that facilitates deeper learning and engagement. Icebreakers are typically easy and nonthreatening, and they can pull people in and help them let down their guard a bit, making the way for deeper, more purposeful participation. To break it down even further, something easy and shallow creates a pathway to something deeper and more meaningful.

When my small group from church meets each Thursday evening, we start with a “connection” question. It’s usually something lighthearted and fun. If you could move to another country, where would you move? What’s your favorite movie? Who is your oldest living relative? What’s your favorite fast food restaurant? These questions get people talking. They help us all get to know each other, and they assist in making everyone feel more at ease in the room. They warm us up! They push the metaphorical door open just a bit … so that once we dive into our discussion questions about the previous Sunday’s sermon, we feel comfortable, safe, and ready to share on a deeper level. 

The Bible talks about making progressions like this. From shallow to deeper, from simple to more complex. For example, this passage in Hebrews is addressing a group of people who had known the basics of God’s teachings but failed to dive deeper and mature spiritually. 

We have much to say about this, but it is hard to make it clear to you because you no longer try to understand. In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil. -Hebrews 5:11-14 

Jesus wants us to constantly be moving into deeper waters. He calls us to leave the easier, more childish ways behind and dive into a deep, full life with Him. 

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. -1 Corinthians 13:11

But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever! Amen. -2 Peter 3:18

What might this look like, practically speaking, in your spiritual life? So many different possibilities! But here are 10 ways to pray about moving your faith life from the 3-foot side of the pool all the way down to the deep end.

1. When you’re with another believer (or a group of believers), start with some light and easy conversations. But then, don’t just leave it at that! Have a couple deeper questions ready to spark conversation about God and what it looks like to live for Him.
2. When you’re spending time in the Word, first take notes on what’s happening in the passage. But then, jot down some burning questions and possible applications. Bring the verses off the page and into your life!
3. Read the Bible often—daily for sure! But then, don’t just read it, challenge yourself to memorize a chapter or several verses. 
4. Do you love listening to Christian music? Me too! Listen to it whenever you’re listening to music. But then, slow down sometimes and think more carefully about the lyrics. Maybe even print them out, and read over them slowly. Look for Bible verses that go along with some of the lines in the song.
5. Of course, you definitely want to attend church regularly. When you first start going, you probably show up for the service and head home right after. But then, get involved! Join a small group, sign up to serve, or talk to the person sitting next to you before or after the service.
6. One thing believers love about church is the pastor’s sermon. It (hopefully!) offers wisdom, practical teaching, and guidance for applying biblical principles to daily life. Listen to the sermons carefully. But then, don’t just sit and listen to them. Take your Bible and a notebook with you to church. Open up the pages of Scripture and follow along as verses are read. Write down some of your pastor’s words that challenge you or encourage you.
7. When you’re talking to a friend who’s facing a difficult time, empathize with them and promise to pray for them (if you actually intend to keep that promise). But then, what if you said a quick prayer for that person right then? …in the moment? …out loud for her to hear? It doesn’t have to be long and fancy! Just heartfelt.
8. If you walk past a homeless person on the sidewalk, maybe you usually just keep walking. Maybe you say a silent prayer, or maybe you are intentional about looking the person in her eyes and smiling at her. What a fantastic thing to do! But then, challenge yourself to say something that demonstrates the kindness of God. Ask how the person is doing today! Ask how you can pray for her. Share an encouraging word that’s on your heart.
9. Join a small group Bible study. Show up every week with your lesson faithfully completed, and the Holy Spirit will teach you so many new insights through the fellow believers in your group. But then, open up and dare to get to know another group member on a more intimate level. Schedule a lunch or coffee date. Be open and vulnerable. You never know how such a relationship might change one of your lives.
10. Spend time communicating with God through prayer. Talk to Him about everything. Share your ups and downs, and ask Him your questions. But then, stop and listen for a few minutes. Maybe there’s something He wants to say to you! Are you creating space for that? Does He get a turn in the conversation? 🙂

By choosing to go one step further, you’re maturing spiritually more and more. If my staff meetings at the beginning of each school year stopped after the ice breakers, yes, some purpose would have been served. But the deeper level of connection and camaraderie might never be felt amongst staff members, and that togetherness is key to a successful school. Ice breakers are beneficial, and so are the first baby steps of your faith! Baby steps help you gain confidence, feel safe, build your knowledge, and prepare for greater understanding. But God doesn’t want you to stay in your toddler walking mode forever. There’s a time and a place when you must decide to go deeper, and that decision isn’t just a one-time thing. It’s continual! So look for it, pursue it, and invite the Holy Spirit into it. As one of my favorite Steven Curtis Chapman songs says:

I’m divin’ in, I’m goin’ deep, In over my head, I wanna be. Caught in the rush, lost in the flow, In over my head, I wanna go. The river’s deep, the river’s wide, The river’s water is alive. So sink or swim, I’m divin’ in!